vlogger zefrank made a special show the other day on a topic near and dear to our hearts at procrastinators.org. If you haven’t checked him out before he has a strange mix of comedy, newsiness, and every so-often, SONG! He recently got a real job so he’ll be going offline soon, so make sure to check him out if you haven’t.
Researchers have formulated a motivation formula called Temporal Motivational Theory. But I hereby rename it The P function, because it determines how likely we are to procrastinate.
A dolphin with extra fins has been discovered (by which I mean captured). Scientists assume this mutation is an evolutionary throwback to before cetaceans lost their back legs.
To me it seems clear that this is just a new body mod fad for bottlenose adolescents.
Never lose a throw for shotgun again. These handy strategies for outmaneuvering your opponent can give you the edge to master the most epic and time-honored battle of wills ever invented: rock paper scissors.
Hats off to these guys for mastery of procrastination. It took two years of development, but they proved that spinning a hard-boiled egg can make it jump. Who funded that research, I have to wonder?
It’s true! Haven’t you ever been behind some old granny on the expressway, anxious and angry to somehow pass them because they had the audacity to be driving the speed limit? Have you ever violently jerked into the next lane to get around them? Did you feel bad for hitting that small animal, whatever it was?
Okay, so maybe that’s just me.
Regardless, when you get some too-clever people who want to make that very point, you end up with a Meditation on the Speed Limit.
Simply awesome.
Here at pc.org, we normally assume a fun, casual definition of procrastination. Putting off boring tasks can be fulfilling because it allows us to feel in charge of our time. To some people though, it might not be so much fun.
We’ve been waiting patiently, and now Raytheon engineers have finally created the first robotic penguin lunar space probe. For security reasons, it does not actually resemble a penguin.
I’m sorry, but this is just too good to pass up.
A small pond in Hamburg, Germany that is normally home to a bunch of toads and crows has suddenly unleashed a disgusting fury. It seems that nearly 1,000 of the amphibious residents have puffed up like a balloon and exploded.
…
What more is there to say?
Apparently, there’s this group out there that has been calling up random internet users and conducting a survey to ask how they feel about spam email.
No comment on whether the group will next be sending out a mass email asking people about their views on telemarketing…
This startling discovery brought to you courtesy of a survey by Microsoft, as reported here. I don’t know about you guys, but I’m going to stop procrastinating.. right after I catch up on slashdot. And penny arcade. And tv.
According to researchers, the effects of global warming could reach an unstoppable turning point. However, if they are wrong, a lot of rich people could lose a lot of money for no reason. Besides, the worst that could happen if they are right is that the entire ecosystem on Earth could be irreparably damaged. Oh, right, we’re still trying to convice the current administration that global warming EXISTS! So much for signing the Kyoto accord.
According to researchers, people will be the most miserable they can be all year on this coming Monday, January 24th. This isn’t an Onion article people, this is science. There’s a formula and everything: “/8W+(D-d) 3/8xTQ MxNA. Where W is weather, D is debt - minus the money (d) due on January’s pay day - and T is the time since Christmas.”
And we all know, if there’s math, it must be true, especially if the formula is more than one line and contains variables. It’s so “confusing” you should just nod your head, and hide under the covers.
Cheerio!
This intriguing article discusses a problem that I’ve never heard of until now. Apparently, electronics have a tendency to grow metal whiskers over time, which can lead to short circuits.
Not to be outdone by a Supreme Court justice, Senator John McCain isn’t dodging his civic duty either.
This is a warning to all those trying to avoid jury duty: Don’t. It seems that Supreme Court Justice is trying to make you look like a bad person. And really, can you blame him?
According to New Orleans, possession of Jell-O with intent to sell is now grounds for school suspension. This means that the school considers the primary use of Jell-O, by kids, mind you, to be an alcohol delivery mechanism. This is a real loss-of-innocence moment for me.
This is a true digital sundial (no electronics or moving parts); it gives a digital clock style readout. Too cool.
This article is pretty long but makes some good points about the current state of privacy in the US. The last page in particular sums up the current situation pretty well.
The specific situation in question is whether your trash still belongs to you once it’s on your curb. If the answer turns out to be “No, garbage is not subject to privacy restrictions” then that begs the next obvious question:
Does that mean that authorities can search the home of Oscar the Grouch without a warrant?
This guy makes single-wheel vehicles for fun! I think he is my new hero. Of course we at procrastinators.org have already outdone that by making a no-wheel vehicle.
Our scientists are currently researching ways to create a vehicle with less than zero wheels.
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