Productivity is Overrated. Site devoted to procrastination, procrastinating, and wasting time in fun ways. Procrastinate with impunity. Neko

 
 

8/31/2005

At last: Robot penguins

Filed under: — Greg @ 3:02 pm

We’ve been waiting patiently, and now Raytheon engineers have finally created the first robotic penguin lunar space probe. For security reasons, it does not actually resemble a penguin.

8/30/2005

Only a theory!

Filed under: — Greg @ 1:48 am

The weaknesses in darwinistic theories have been glossed over for too long. Several new theories have come to favor in recent years to try to fill in the gaps.
(more…)

8/24/2005

heh

Filed under: — Greg @ 3:17 pm

int.

  1. (onomatopoeia) Representing brief laughter.
  2. A polite but content-free response to any statement in IRC/IM/e-mail intended to be humorous, clever, or amusing. Saying “heh” does not carry any connotation of whether the responder considers said statement to actually be humorous, clever, or amusing.

8/21/2005

Repairing a Palm Tungsten-T

Filed under: — Greg @ 9:01 pm

My trusty PDA had a willing spirit, but was plagued with increasingly many problems as it aged. I took some time today to take the thing apart, poke around inside fixing and cleaning, and make a nice record of my adventure, complete with pictures.

tungsten-t-repair.pdf

Enjoy!

8/19/2005

Rules for hitting on the waitress

Filed under: — Greg @ 11:11 pm
  1. Do not hit on the waitress.
  2. If you find yourself thinking “I think that waitress really likes me”, see rule #1. This rule also applies to strippers, but what are you doing at a strip club anyway.
  3. If you are at Hooters, see rule #1. Also, try the buffalo chicken.
  4. Actually, it’s still a free country, so hit on whoever you want. Just remember that with a customer/server dynamic, it’s not all that easy to tell the difference between someone who is good at her job, from someone who wants to be hit on.

–Erick, Greg

Laws of FelineDynamics

Filed under: — Greg @ 10:33 pm
  1. Conservation of energy. Cats sleep almost all the time, which conserves their energy for important tasks (such as getting in the way of your work).
  2. Catropy of a closed system will increase. The entropy in your life due to cats (catropy) tends to increase over time. This is because you gradually give up and realize that the cat is the one who is in charge.
  3. It is impossible to cause a cat to lose balance by any finite process. Cats are commonly believed to flip themselves around in mid-air to land on their feet, however this is a physical impossibility. In actuality, the cat simply adjusts the universe so that the direction it is facing becomes “down”.

–Greg

catropy

Filed under: — Greg @ 10:13 pm

n.

  1. A measure of the disorder present in your life due to cats.
  2. The tendency of cats to cause chaos.

See also: Laws of FelineDynamics

–Greg

IOC (International Obfuscation Committee)

Filed under: — Greg @ 7:12 pm

n.

  1. The IOC is the worldwide organization that determines the simplest, most straightforward way to market products and present information, and then enforces the exact opposite. Past IOC mandates have included the following:
    • Number of hotdogs in a package shall not equal number of hotdog buns in a package.
    • Pillows of different sizes must be presented without a size distinction where possible; under no circumstances shall a size indication be attached or imprinted onto the pillow itself.
    • New television shows with high ratings shall have their timeslots changed a minimum of twice per month during the first 3 months of the season.
    • Daylight Savings Time.
    • Gasoline gallon prices shall not have an integral number of cents.
    • Computer error dialogs are required to give as little information as possible. Error messages should cause the user to believe they are at fault, and possibly facing legal action (e.g. “Illegal operation in excel.exe”).

–Greg

8/14/2005

greaseache

Filed under: — Greg @ 9:08 am

n.

  1. The feeling your stomach gets 30-90 minutes (100 ml) after eating at a Steak-n-Shake.

–Greg

8/13/2005

thermal mass

Filed under: — Doug @ 1:47 am

n.

  1. A measurement of how hard it is to change the temperature of an object or a substance. In scientific circles, this would be known as “specific heat,” which totally doesn’t sound like what it means. A bowl of nacho cheese could be said to have a massive thermal mass.

–Doug

8/9/2005

snid

Filed under: — mere @ 8:01 pm

n.

  1. Little balls of fuzz that form on clothing.

related: Snid Eater

  1. Electronic device used for removing snids.

–mere

shiznitobiggitybizomb

Filed under: — Greg @ 7:55 pm

n.

  1. The mega-superlative form of awesome, combining the powers of the words shiznit and biggity bizomb.
  2. A person, place, or thing so amazingly great that it requires a 21-letter word to adequately express.

–Brian.V

Meep

Filed under: — mere @ 7:54 pm

n.

  1. The sound made by a happy ferret.
  2. A greeting used over IRC and instant messages.

–mere

coolio

Filed under: — Greg @ 2:44 am

adj.

  1. l33t, expressed in a non-l33t form.

–Brian.V

equality tests

Filed under: — Greg @ 2:43 am

oper.

  1. == : Equality
  2. === : Strict equality
  3. ==== : Must have same variable name equality

–Brian.V

morong

Filed under: — Greg @ 2:40 am

n.

  1. A person who is always wrong, and hence a fool.

–Brian.V

loast

Filed under: — Greg @ 2:38 am

n.

  1. The state of having inadvertently lost vast quantities of work, and thereby become toast.

–Greg

tipying

Filed under: — Greg @ 2:36 am

n.

  1. Typing poorly while drunk.

–Greg

foof

Filed under: — Greg @ 2:36 am

v.

  1. To blow around easily and look silly in the wind; i.e. medium length fine hair.

–Greg

sleep hangover

Filed under: — Greg @ 2:34 am

n.

  1. The headache that occurs after you have slept several hours too long.

–Greg

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